Beating the urge to give up on your New Years resolution

It happens so often that January 1st rolls around and we make all of these New Year’s resolutions and we are totally gung ho…we are going to make some serious life changes.  For the first week or 2 you are killing it…week 3 rolls around and you’re faced with an obstacle here and there but you are still full steam ahead….there is nothing that is going to stand in your way.  Week 4 a few more obstacles…you’re still determined but you can start to feel the wind in your sails depleting.  Come February you begin to justify somethings in your mind as to why this resolution just wasn’t for you.  Doubt, disappointment, and feelings of failure start to cloud your mind.  Before you know it you’ve convinced yourself that you are unable to live up to the resolutions that you made.  Is this a scenario you can identify with?

I can relate to this in so many ways.  Although I create resolutions throughout the year I run into so many obstacles that will trigger me into feelings of self doubt and making up stories in my head.  What I have learned though is that is this is when true grit must come into play.  This is where vulnerability is essential.  I want you to remember one thing…THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS SELF-MADE….NO ONE CAN DO IT ALONE.  Sometimes you need a little help from you friends, mentors, leaders, and/or coaches.

When you originally made that resolution who or what were you inspired by?  Seek that person or that object out.  Recognize that the results that were created by this person, place, or thing were not created over night.  It was ups and downs, trials and errors, successes and failures that eventually led to what you were inspired by.  Keep in mind that as I am sharing this with you I am repeating this to myself as well.

Just yesterday I had reached out to my mentor and shared my feelings of being lost and struggling with how to move forward in my mission to change the world one head at a time.  It took that outside perspective to not only give me the guidance that I needed but also hold me accountable for all of my best of intentions that I wasn’t really giving my all to.  After having about a 1 hour conversation I feel like I am back on track.  Had I let my fears take the wheel and not reached out to someone who has traveled down this road before I may have given up or fallen so off course that it could have set me back years.

It is completely ridiculous to think that you can achieve the ultimate level of greatness completely by yourself.  You need guidance you, you need accountability, you need a cheerleader.  It doesn’t always mean having a live person with you at all times…it means reading a book on how to do what you want to do.  If you want to be a millionaire…you read books written by people that have made millions…If you want to have a healthy diet you read a book written by someone who eats a healthy diet…If you want to be incredibly physically fit you read a book by someone who has become incredibly physically fit.  Or you watch videos of people accomplishing these things.  Find a mentor or a leader that you can reach out to.  There other thing to remember is that finding a mentor does not always mean the CEO of the company….you work your way from the bottom.  The person that knows just one more thing than you do then work your way up.  Here is the secret though…you’ll want to sit down for this.  Are you ready???  After you read these books or learn from these mentors you actually have to act on these things…you have to do the work!

Now is the time to do it…don’t let that resolution slip away!  You can do ANYTHING AND I MEAN ANYTHING.  It’s not easy but it is worth it.  That feeling of accomplishment and growth that you will experience is one of the greatest feelings in the world.  Every step forward is a step in the right direction no matter how big or small the step!

Find your mentor, put your lessons into action, become the best possible version of yourself.  Please share this with anyone and everyone that this could potentially help in their pursuit of greatness

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Intentionally Lola, Dopamine Dealer. Here’s my card

Hey kids, I’ve got something for you. You are going to love the way it makes you feel. I’m going to give you just a little taste of it now. Go tell all your friends about it and then come back and see me when you’re ready for more.

What is it that you’re getting a taste of you ask? It’s called dopamine and I’ve got the good stuff! I’ve been getting my supply from people around the world but I just got my biggest and best supply to date and I am willing to share it with you. There’s a catch though. You have to take it and share it with your friends.

Here ya go, open your mind wide and say ahhhhhhh. Here’s a taste.

You know that thing that you’ve been wanting to do? You hear that voice in your head that keeps nagging you about what you really WANT to do in your life? Well, today is the day. Today is the day that you start making that shit happen and stop waiting for the right time. That “right time” is never going to come.

Today is the day that you start seeking out the other people in the world that have done what you are wanting to do. They are out there but here’s the thing…you have to find them. Find them, talk to them, ask them questions, and then implement their suggestions. Then go back and ask them more questions….not until you have used all the information they gave you last time though. Nothing is going to annoy a great mentor more than a person asking for help and then them not taking action on it.

Find out what books they’re reading. Find out what podcasts and TED-talks they are listening to….then you read those books….you listen to those podcasts and TED-talks. Then start doing the things they are doing. Here’s the thing…because you have a different personality, different look, different style…you could try to do things exactly like that other person but it will be a little different because it will be coming from you. You are going to put your own unique spin on it and maybe even make it better than the original.

Surround yourself with the people you want to be like….that’s how you make shit happen. BAM! I know you’re gonna run out of that little supply I gave you but you know where to find me….I’ll be here and I can give you even more next time. You just let me know how much you’ll need and I will make sure you get plenty. Make sure you share it with your friends too though. They will love it just as much as you do!!!

Self-made is fiction

You often hear the word self-made when people talk about their successes. They worked hard, worked diligently, they did what ever they had to do to succeed.  While I absolutely believe that they worked hard, diligently, and did whatever that had to do to succeed…the self-made part…meaning they did all alone.  I’m calling bullshit on that one.  No one ever gets to the top alone.  Everyone finds help along the way.

Over the past 8 years or so I have really been on purpose to find the coaches in my life.  People that I want to be like.  Most of these people I have chosen as a coach have no idea I even exist.  Through the gift of technology I am able to follow their paths through audiobooks, podcasts, tedtalks, or the like.  I have also had many coaches who definitely knew of my existence but may not have known they were my coach.  One in particular was one that created my existence.  My Father.  There are no words in any language that could express the amount of gratitude I have for my Father.  He has taught me so many things and I am forever grateful for him.

Throughout life I have found that I have had a series of coaches.  Some that until just recently I didn’t even think of as a coach.  It wasn’t until I heard where the word coach was derived from in that wonderful book “The 15 invaluable Laws of Growth” by John Maxwell that I recognized it.  The word Coach comes from the horse-drawn coaches that were created in the 1500’s in the German village Kotsche.  Coaches were originally created to transport royalty.  In time they would also carry valuables, mail, and common passengers.  Today the word is defined as someone or something that carries a valued person from where they are to where they want to be.  If you have a coach you know you will end up at your desired location.

I have many coaches for many different things.  Some are life long coaches and some are coaches for only a moment.  My very first coach in my career was the Co-owner of the salon I worked for nearly 13 years, Stephen Wake.  He took me and my career to place I didn’t even know was possible.  He had a gift of creating a vision.  I am not sure if he is aware of the impact he has made on me and my life but I hope to someday have the opportunity to show him.  The other is the other co-owner of that salon, Tricia Wake.  Tricia taught me how to value and accept the differences in people.  She taught me that not everyone learns the same.  She taught how to coach people on an individual level.

Some of my current coaches are John Maxwell, Brene Brown, Simon Sinek, and many more.  None of these people know of my existence but I go out of my way to listen to their words and incorporate their missions as my own.  My current in person coach is Bennie Pollard.  I have reached new heights professionally and personally as a result of having this man in my life.  He has created a team of coaches and leaders that I admire, respect ,and strive to be.

When it comes to reaching your goals no matter what those goals are, keep in mind you did not get there alone.  It was through research that you found through the successes and failures of others.  It was through the motivation of those that have done it before you and it was through that one or more people seeing your value and helping you get where are you today.

You did not do it alone…you are not self-made and the moment you realize that you open yourself up to greater growth and greater potential.  When you realize that it was through the help of others that you are where you are, you will begin to seek out more coaches to get you even further.

The most successful people know that there is always someone to learn from.  If you are at the very top of your class you are in the wrong class…you should always put yourself in a circle of people who are smarter and stronger than you.  That is the only way to ensure that you keep growing.

I would love to know who your coaches are.  If you need help finding coaches I be happy to help you find them if I am able to.

Please like and share this so we can reach as many people as possible.  I am constantly seeking out new coaches and would love to hear from as many people as possible in order to find them.