This is what 2018 will bring for you

2017 was a wonderful year for me.  I have never experienced so much growth in such a short period of time.  I can attribute that to all of the tragedies I experienced.  The salon lost a senior stylist, had massive turn over, endured a security breach which left us with NOTHING, major appliance repair bills, and so much more that I know I’m leaving out.  Taking all those negative things and turning them into positives was amazing and a result of all the education I got in 2017.  I took many classes hosted by our amazing distribution company focusing on business strategies and systems, I read SO many books on development, leadership, and growth, and I attended the best growth and knowledge seminar I have ever experienced, Vision Quest, hosted in the beautiful Carlsbad California.

Reading and attending these “growth seminars” is what really brought me to this level of enlightenment.  Surrounding myself with like-minded people with killer strategies and a relentless forward motion towards greatness.

The A-ha moment I am having is that these amazing people who I had the pleasure of learning from all had one thing in common.  They all learned everything they know from other people.  That’s it….they took a philosophy, personalized it, ran with it and failed many times, kept getting up and dusting themselves off, and kept on polishing up their brand.  These philosophies and systems they teach and empower others with is nothing more than knowledge they learned from someone else.  It’s up-cycled information!

Why is this important to know and understand?  Because you need to know that the only thing keeping you from a heightened level of greatness is the proper information.  You have the desire, you have the proper vessel necessary to take you to the world’s greatest heights now all you have to do is fill that vessel with words, encouragement, strategies, and systems.

1. One book leads to another, leads to another, and leads to another

Every book that I have read this year was recommended by the Author of the book I was currently reading.  If you are really moved by the words you are reading know that the information that you are gathering are simply ideas and philosophies gathered from other people.  The Author received information, up-cycled it, and put their own unique energy into it.  Also know that if you are reading a book and it is not speaking to you….you don’t have to finish it.  Who made up the rule that you have to read a book from beginning to end…if you’re not into it put it down and find one that speaks to you.

 2.  TedTalks, YouTube, GoalCast….Videos stimulate you in a different way

There is something about watching a video that really gets me going.  To physically SEE the passion in someone’s eyes as they are sharing their stories and ideas…that is powerful stuff.  You can also learn great presentation skills by watching the way they present themselves.  The internet has put together an endless amount of information  for you to watch and learn from.  My favorite right now is Impact Theory…In fact I am wearing my new Impact Theory sweatshirt as I write this blog.  It says “Everything is My Fault”…and I love it.  I am all about taking responsibility for everything in my life and this sweatshirt empowers me when I wear it.  Visit Impact Theory to get some inspiration!

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 3.  Asking questions and hearing people’s stories

This one seems so obvious but I truly just learned its importance and magnitude at 41 years old.  To really hear someone’s story…man that is powerful and so inspiring.  Most of the time you have no idea the level of emotion that the people around you are carrying.  Most people will not just share that information either.  You have to give them a safe place to tell it (an honestly judgment-free zone) and ask them good questions.  Good questions come in the form of a genuine desire to learn about the person.  If you find yourself asking questions in hopes of getting the dirt on someone’s life that is the opposite of a safe place.  The information shared with you must be used for 2 main purposes…#1 to connect with the person that you are talking too and #2 to gain knowledge and insight that you can use in your own life.  These stories should NEVER be shared without the permission of the person telling them.

2018 is filled with opportunities and I believe these opportunities come in books, videos, and stories.  To be your very best self you must surround yourself with people who share that same desire and show action.  I consider the books, videos, and stories to be those people as well.  It doesn’t always have to be a physical person next to you it can simply be their ideals.

Read, watch, learn, grow….that’s where it’s at!!!  

11 rules to respect for yourself and your industry…no matter what it is

I came to a realization recently that in my quest to raise the respect level of the beauty industry that this is something that can be used across the board…no matter your industry.  If you are in an industry that you feel does not get the respect is deserves it is up to you to take responsibility for it.  If you find yourself saying “I hold myself to a high standard it’s everyone else that is the problem” you have to take responsibility for that too!  If you are an industry leader it is your responsibility to lead those down the path of mastering that same leadership.  The only way we can do this is to do it together.  Here is the thing though… it’s ALL ABOUT YOUR ATTITUDE!

1. Assume the best out of everyone.  If others in your industry are not holding themselves to a higher standard therefore not earning respect assume that is because they don’t know how or know that it is even an option. Not that they just don’t want to or don’t care enough.  So many people never had that person in their life telling them how smart and powerful they are.  BE THAT PERSON!!!

2. Be thankful for as much or as little as you have.  No matter what you have its is something you have to be thankful for.  My boyfriend shared with me that after working an 18 hour day only to get up 5 hours later to do it all over again he saw a man pushing a cart full of metal that he had collected from the streets.   What an eye-opener.  The thing is if I had the opportunity to speak to that man pushing the cart he too would have something to be thankful for.  When you count your blessings it gives you a feeling of power and strength that can be used to pass onto others.

3. Make eye contact with EVERYONE!  The cashiers, your server, your barista, any human being that you have contact with…look them in the eyes!

4. Smile!  Smile at everyone!!!  A smile has an energy that is contagious.

5. Shake hands….everyone that you greet…shake their hand.  Learn how to give a proper handshake…no limp wrist or dead fish handshakes…those are disgusting and will only cost you respect not earn it.

6. Stand up straight…head up, shoulders back, chest out!  I can see your confidence level in your posture…if your not feeling confident fake it with perfect posture and eventually you become confident!

7. Use powerful words…words that perk people’s ears.  Delivery those words in a way that create intrigue.

8. Take care of your hygiene!  Respect is lost when you are the stinky kid…deodorant, breath mints…if you’re a smoker find a way to get rid of that smell….use perfume/cologne but use it sparingly!

9. ONLY wear clothes that you KNOW you look fucking awesome in!!  If you put something on and you look in the mirror and think “meh”….donate it!  GET IT OUT OF YOUR CLOSET IMMEDIATELY!  Only wear pieces you feel killer in!!!

10. BE EARLY!  I’d rather be 3 hours early than 1 minute late!!!

11. Choose to have a killer attitude…at the end of the day EVERYTHING is a choice!

If you follow these rules of thumb, teach them to the people in your industry, hold yourself and them accountable….you become a force to be reckoned with and so will your industry!

 

 

 

What happens when you define your mission

My favorite artist/singer/poet/activist/ultra-feminist, Ani Difranco, has a song titled “Out of Habit” that contains the lyrics “Art is why I get up in the morning  But my definition ends there And it doesn’t seem fair That I’m living for something I can’t even define”.  Even though I’ve been singing that song at the top of my longs for nearly 20 years now….those words have really began to resonate with me.  Until recently I knew what I wanted my life to look like but I couldn’t define it.  It wasn’t until meeting a few truly inspiring people who I am finally able to define my purpose in life.  “To change the way hairdressers and the beauty industry is viewed.”  By demanding the respect the industry so greatly deserves.  Empowering them to hold themselves to a standard so high they cannot be ignored.  To let them know that no matter who is sitting at the table there is a seat for them…ceo’s, cfo’s, state officials, doctors, lawyers, professors….pull up a chair people!”  What I have found is so many people go through life not knowing how damn smart and powerful they really are.  So many people don’t have that person in their life telling them they can do anything,  supporting them and to help push them to the top.  If that person does not exist in their life..I will be that person.

I share this with EVERYONE because this applies to human beings in general.  This is a concept that can be utilized with anyone…whether you want to change the way you as a person are viewed or the industry you have dedicated yourself to.  This certainly does not just apply to hairdressers.

I will be preaching the good word about how strategically branding yourself will earn you the respect you so greatly deserve. I was lucky enough to be taught the importance of this by Bennie Pollard and Paula Hensen of Cool Beauty Consulting.  It is now my responsibility to share this with the future hairdressers of the world.

Smiling, making eye contact, shaking hands, having a killer wardrobe, great personal hygiene, using great dialogue and delivery, great posture, being punctual, and having an exceptional attitude.  Sharing the importance of these 9 things to the future hairdressers of the world.  But this goes FAR BEYOND hairdressing.  This is just human beings holding themselves to a higher standard in general.  This is something we should be teaching our children and something that we as adults should be doing every day!

At Lola we call this “The Art of Mastering Badassery”.  Now that I can define my mission….now that I have an actual strategy of spreading this mission…I AM UNSTOPPABLE!!!!   As long as my heart is beating I know that my assignment is not complete!!!  I invite you to join me in being a badass and teaching those around us how to be badasses….ANYONE can Master the Art of Badassery!!!  Let’s do this shit!!!!!

Self-made is fiction

You often hear the word self-made when people talk about their successes. They worked hard, worked diligently, they did what ever they had to do to succeed.  While I absolutely believe that they worked hard, diligently, and did whatever that had to do to succeed…the self-made part…meaning they did all alone.  I’m calling bullshit on that one.  No one ever gets to the top alone.  Everyone finds help along the way.

Over the past 8 years or so I have really been on purpose to find the coaches in my life.  People that I want to be like.  Most of these people I have chosen as a coach have no idea I even exist.  Through the gift of technology I am able to follow their paths through audiobooks, podcasts, tedtalks, or the like.  I have also had many coaches who definitely knew of my existence but may not have known they were my coach.  One in particular was one that created my existence.  My Father.  There are no words in any language that could express the amount of gratitude I have for my Father.  He has taught me so many things and I am forever grateful for him.

Throughout life I have found that I have had a series of coaches.  Some that until just recently I didn’t even think of as a coach.  It wasn’t until I heard where the word coach was derived from in that wonderful book “The 15 invaluable Laws of Growth” by John Maxwell that I recognized it.  The word Coach comes from the horse-drawn coaches that were created in the 1500’s in the German village Kotsche.  Coaches were originally created to transport royalty.  In time they would also carry valuables, mail, and common passengers.  Today the word is defined as someone or something that carries a valued person from where they are to where they want to be.  If you have a coach you know you will end up at your desired location.

I have many coaches for many different things.  Some are life long coaches and some are coaches for only a moment.  My very first coach in my career was the Co-owner of the salon I worked for nearly 13 years, Stephen Wake.  He took me and my career to place I didn’t even know was possible.  He had a gift of creating a vision.  I am not sure if he is aware of the impact he has made on me and my life but I hope to someday have the opportunity to show him.  The other is the other co-owner of that salon, Tricia Wake.  Tricia taught me how to value and accept the differences in people.  She taught me that not everyone learns the same.  She taught how to coach people on an individual level.

Some of my current coaches are John Maxwell, Brene Brown, Simon Sinek, and many more.  None of these people know of my existence but I go out of my way to listen to their words and incorporate their missions as my own.  My current in person coach is Bennie Pollard.  I have reached new heights professionally and personally as a result of having this man in my life.  He has created a team of coaches and leaders that I admire, respect ,and strive to be.

When it comes to reaching your goals no matter what those goals are, keep in mind you did not get there alone.  It was through research that you found through the successes and failures of others.  It was through the motivation of those that have done it before you and it was through that one or more people seeing your value and helping you get where are you today.

You did not do it alone…you are not self-made and the moment you realize that you open yourself up to greater growth and greater potential.  When you realize that it was through the help of others that you are where you are, you will begin to seek out more coaches to get you even further.

The most successful people know that there is always someone to learn from.  If you are at the very top of your class you are in the wrong class…you should always put yourself in a circle of people who are smarter and stronger than you.  That is the only way to ensure that you keep growing.

I would love to know who your coaches are.  If you need help finding coaches I be happy to help you find them if I am able to.

Please like and share this so we can reach as many people as possible.  I am constantly seeking out new coaches and would love to hear from as many people as possible in order to find them.

What we want versus what we do

I am listening to “The 15 Invaluable Laws of Growth” by John Maxwell…AGAIN.  This was such an amazing and eye opening book that I can certainly envision myself listening to it dozens of times as I put his practices into action.  Here is a quote he referenced by James Allen.  “People are anxious to improve their circumstances but unwilling to improve themselves”.  Man, I listened to that over and over again about 15 times!

Prior to making the decision to live an intentional life I found myself working harder and harder to reach my goals and getting no where.  I was becoming so frustrated.  I, like most people, thought the harder I worked the more successful I would be.  That is ultimately untrue.  It wasn’t until I could clearly define what I was working so hard for that I began to reach my goals.  In order to do that I had to take a long hard look at myself and realize that I had to make some changes to myself before I could make changes to my life.

I have always been a very empathetic person however I began to realize that the way I communicated did not emulate how I was feeling inside.  For instance, if things were not going the way I wanted them to at the salon I found myself getting very angry with the staff for not living up to my expectations….here is the kicker though…I never told them my expectations….what the hell???  How could I possibly expect anyone to exceed the expectations of their position if they didn’t even know what the expectations were? Even then…when I communicated my expectations it wasn’t until I took the time to show them exactly how I wanted things done and empowered them to teach those strategies to the next person that things began to change.

It was through TONS of leadership classes, books, mentoring, and self development that I was able to start communicating in a way that allowed me to take an intentional approach on what my expectations were.  Here is what I ultimately figured out…instead of creating a team full of followers that keeps you in a position of constantly spinning your wheels….I needed to create a team of leaders who could take not only themselves but the future generations of Lola to the next level.

In the beginning of this journey it would sting a little to know that I was the one that needed the fixing.  It is funny how things have come full circle though.  Now I very rarely find myself blaming anyone for anything that has gone wrong in my day, my week, my year, my life, or my company.  I am in complete control of my life.  Does that mean nothing goes wrong…..HELL NO.  I’m faced with obstacles every single day however my view has completely changed.  Now instead of blaming other people I look to myself.  Did I tell them exactly what I wanted?  Did I communicate correctly?  Did I choose the right team member?  Did I make a decision out of fear instead of love?  Once I figure out the problem I change my direction!

I could have never gotten to this place of clarity without the leaders and coaches in my life.  Bennie Pollard, founder of Cool Beauty Consulting, has been a major player in my growth process.  As a leader himself…and a damn good one he has introduced me to so many other leaders and coaches.  Most who have no idea I even exist but I quality them as my coaches anyway.  I am so thankful to have Bennie in my life.  Who is your coach?  Do you have one?  If not, take the time to think about the person in your life that you most want to emulate.  Even if it is someone you don’t know….Maybe it’s an author…or a blogger…a speaker…whoever.   I think they can still be your coach even if they don’t know it.  Learn from the people around you and then pay it forward!!